The Best Rejection I Ever Got

The Best Rejection I Ever Got

Sometimes a “NO” is EXACTLY what you need.

Getting rejected was my wake-up call — and I never saw it coming.

I had a group of friends who felt more like family. We saw each other several times a week, belonged to the same organization, and were deeply committed to it. We were tight.

Then the pandemic hit — and everything moved online.

Meetings moved online, and while I understood why, I missed that in-person energy — the laughs, the side conversations, just being together. You can't replicate that on a screen.

When things started opening back up, I assumed we'd all rush back. I thought everyone felt the same way I did.

They didn't.

The feeling of abandonment cut deeper than I expected. I reached out, tried to get people to come back. But they were staying home, and that was that.

That's where the Enneagram changed everything. Working with my coach, I began to understand why this hurt so much. 

The Enneagram is a personality system that identifies nine distinct types, each with its own emotional wiring, strengths, and blind spots. 

If you tend to have intense emotional reactions and a deep need for meaningful connection, you might be an Enneagram 4 — “The Individualist.” That was me.

What I didn't know then is that the Enneagram Type 4 has a remarkable gift — when they do their work, they have an extraordinary ability to transform their pain into purpose and completely reinvent their lives. 

Understanding my type was a turning point. It helped me see that my pain was real — but it was also telling me something important. 

I'd put all my eggs in one basket and hadn't built much of a life outside of it.

I started branching out. I launched two businesses, joined a community group, started swimming daily, and I'm running for my condo board.

My life is fuller than ever.

That rejection that once broke my heart? Turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me. 

Have you ever experienced a rejection that turned out to be a blessing?

CLICK HERE and let’s set up a time to chat. I'd love to hear your story.

Hi! I am Paula McCoach of Your Number Matters. As an experienced Enneagram coach & consultant, I specialize in helping others discover their Enneagram number & use their strengths to transform into their best selves. I offer both in-person & online coaching for individuals & groups.

I’ve been actively studying and working with the Enneagram for over 20 years, with a focus in the Riso-Hudson tradition. My journey has included participation in numerous Enneagram retreats, workshops, and trainings aimed at deepening both personal growth and professional application.

Since 2019, I’ve been a member of an advanced monthly Enneagram study group facilitated by certified Enneagram coaches and authors, and I am currently training with a Riso-Hudson Certified Enneagram coach and licensed therapist. I’m also a member of the International Enneagram Association (IEA), where I continue my education through ongoing trainings and community engagement.

My approach integrates psychological insight, somatic awareness, and spiritual development—bringing depth and compassion to individuals and groups seeking transformation through the lens of the Enneagram.

Outside of my Enneagram business, I am a Tutor both privately and with Wright Academics. I tutor in English Language Arts, writing, executive function, as well as in test prep for SAT, ACT and ISEE.